sitting in front of the computer

it seems all i do is sit in front of the computer. getting more and more depressed. i hate this feeling. I feel myself sink deeper and deeper and i really don't know what to do. i think about all the things that are problematic in my life and i just feel horrible. it's dax's birthday...i shouldn't be depressed. I should be playing with him. I should be making time for him. sometimes i feel like such a lousy mother.