Keto keep coming....

I am now on day 6.  I've kept well under 1500 calories each day.  and the carb count is under 30 but never at 20.  It's hard to eat only 20 carbs and get enough calories.  Am I hungry, yes.  I am.  But it's not hard to eat a snack when I'm hungry and then move on.   I'm able to keep the cravings at bay as well.  I'm using diet orange soda to keep my sweet cravings satisfied.  Last night I hate all the meal I made to full.  I just needed to feel full.  But again, I think I was only at 23 carbs total. 

Am I at ketosis?  I have no idea.  I'm feeling better.  My mind feels clearer.  I don't feel as foggy as I had in the past before the keto diet.  So I got that going for me...  haha.  At night I'm tired but I"m not exhausted like I was before the diet.  I'm surprised I"m not tired.  When I did that low carb diet years ago, I remember just being exhausted.  But that was a high protein, low carb, low fat diet.  I wasn't doing it right at all. 

I don't know if I'm going to be able to keep this up.  I really want to, but I know me.  I'm tired of being fat and I like the way this diet makes me feel minus the hungry as hell, however, I'm eating to lose weight on top of eating low carb.  Friday will be my cheat day.  I'm taking the kids to 6 flags and I'm gonna eat what I want.   Hopefully the lines are too long.

It's getting easier - Day 3

Again, yesterday was day three.  I let the day end and write about it the next day.  As early as I can so I remember most of it. 

I was irritated yesterday.  Dax was driving me crazy.  He does that tho.  I love that boy so much but damn, it grinds my nerves.  I worry that it's going to be what our relationship is like.  Although last night at the event the lady who was there to talk with her child about juvenile arthritis made a statement how her son use to drive her nuts when he was young and he's not that little boy anymore.  He's a better lad.  so there is hope.

anyhoo...about the diet.  Irritability YES.  head YES. cravings, Not too many.  dizzy feeling, better.

I'm finding I have a lot of energy at night.  When I was exhausted, I'm now not feeling bad.  I'm still able to fall asleep ok.  But I've always been good at that.  I am having vivid dreams that I'm remembering in the morning, so that's new. 

I ate less than 1000 calories yesterday.  And although I was hungry at times it wasn't bad.  I took my pickle/ham roll up snack to the event with me so that when I was hungry I had something to eat that would satisfy me.  I did reach for the chocolate/mink candies but that was more just habit than craving.  i'm really surprised at how focused on this diet I am.  I have the alcohol I can drink ready so that I'm not tempted with wine at Shea's house.  She's back, so I'll be hanging out with her for a spell today.  And I've got to not partake in wine! 

So, I'm sitting here with my bullet proof coffee, starting the day.  I wonder if I'm in ketosis.  I think I am.  It does feel like I'm better.  More energy.  hopefully soon less frustration!  :)

Day 2

Yesterday was day two.  Today is day 3 so I'll write about yesterday today. 

Yesterday I felt funky too.  My head hurt, I felt far away, and my stomach hurt.  It's odd.  I wake up feeling good.  I drink my bullet proof coffee and feel fine, then I break my fast at about 12pm and everything goes downhill. 

To offset the symptoms I'm trying to drink lots of water, eat salty food (I've started drinking beef/chicken broth) and taking minerals.  They help a little but I got to keep it up.  If I forget to drink water then the weird feelings come back. 

When dinner comes around I tend to feel better and then I go to sleep.  I've been hungry and have anxiety (bitchiness).  I'm hypersensitive to noise, which doesn't help with Dax haha. 

He's about to read over my shoulder, so I'm going to end here, plus I'm busy getting ready for the GTWO event and my head hurts.  I've taken some ibuprofen, so hopefully i'll feel better soon.

Keto Dieting and Me

Christopher brought up the Keto Diet.  I've been reading about it and I even tried for us once.  I got the flu.  A couple of weeks ago I started talking to Courtney about it.  She's been doing Keto for more than a year and she loves it AND she's been losing weight like crazy.  We talked and she helped me get over some of the fears I was having about it.  It seems that with my life, there are times when things are difficult and the path is blocked.  So I stop doing what I was doing because obviously it's not working.  And then something changes and bamb....the path opens up and here I go.  This is what happened with this Keto diet. 

the first time around I was so frustrated, it seemed so hard.  The menu, the recipes, the expectations...all pointing in the direction of it not working.  Then I got the flu and I was like.  OK, I'm done.

Now, the menu came together really nicely.  The meals are really delish and my body/mind seems to be ready to do this.  So here we go.  I'm also not doing this with Christopher or for Christopher.  I'm doing it for me.  He may or may not eat the foods with me.  Which he's welcome to.  Although, I need to tell him that if he's gonna be doing this, he needs to come up with recipes and cook some of this food.  It can't fall on me 100%.  But if he goes another direction with this diet, I'm cool with that.  This isn't about him, it's about me and losing this weight that I've gained.  I just don't like how my body looks.  I see glimpses of my beauty but then I see the fat.  It's not good.  I should just love myself for what it is.  and I do, but i'd rather be skinnier.

So I started the actual diet yesterday.  It was hard in the afternoon but I think as time goes on I'll be able to tweek it. I pretty much nailed my macros and came under calories.  I ate 1400 calories instead of the 1500 that is allotted to me!  I know, how can you survive on 1500 calories???  I don't know, hopefully skinnier!  haha

I had more energy after coming home, which was nice.  I cooked like crazy and made dinner (big mac salad), the next meal (chili), and 2 snacks.  It was a lot of food.  I'll make some fat bombs this evening but I'm mostly going to sit with Christopher and watch a movie.  It'll be fun.

If I keep on this diet I will lose weight.  I have no doubt about it.  I'll also write on this blog how I feel as I go. Wouldn't that be fun!

oh and DAMN, was I depressed 10 years go!  oh my god, I really did need to leave Kai.  I was so unhappy.  I don't feel like that anymore.  Sometimes I'm sad but mostly, I'm good.  I'm ok with what's going on with me!

I quit after 3 days

Yep.  Quit.  I couldn't do it anymore.  The emotional roller coaster was too much.  Not having the house in order, fighting with kai and then going back to work.  Nope.  No thank you.  Not gonna do it.  I don't know if anything has changed.  At the time I really wanted to do it again.  Now I have no desire. 

Day two of hellth

Day two is harder.  Of course we got the children.  That made things worse.  Plus it hasn't stopped raining.  I'm so hungry.  Nothing good feels happening.   I have no hope.  I'm just not happy.

Cleanse, yoga and life

Today I start a cleanse that Christopher asked me to do with him.   We are only eating raw foods in blended form.  I was starving but really right now I just have a headache. 

I also started revolution: 31 days of yoga with Adrienne.  I did day one.  I'm happy I did the yoga, I was going to skip it but I didn't.  I got off my ass and did the practice.  It was super short and easy.  I needed it to be both!

I'm feeling bloated and sore.  My tongue hurts.  I'm emotional as all hell.  And my head.  Holy shit.  

I hope tomorrow is better. 

I'm going to focus on doing these practices.   Doing this cleanse.  Being open to healing and health.